Going into month 10

[Anonymous]

It is good to look at the changes that occur as we move into the last few months of the course. My prior experience being 30 some years in Yoshinkan Aikido have left me with various physical aches and pains. These mostly have been in my right shoulder and wrist. Lower back issues I have been able to work with ever since a serious injury on the mats in the early 90’s. Acupuncture and some tai chi from a practitioner helped me look at the internal aspects a bit. Yoshinkan has never been known to openly discuss Ki/chi, so my experience has been with tai chi and my aikikai brothers and sisters.
Even with those that I talked to opening and closing never came up. I had noticed that my wrist/hand and shoulder were beginning to show increased joint pain and stiffness. Enough to limit everyday activities and definitely enough to have my uke/ nage relationship not as vigorous. Within 4 months I noticed that I could make changes in the mobility and limit and even eliminate pain with some effort. There is still a “phantom” feeling that is residual but, it is much less than when I started and I am having longer periods of relief without discomfort.
I still don’t feel my shoulder will hold up to any strenuous shihonage but that’s ok… I don’t need to test that right now.
An unexpected change has been my sleep patters. For years now I have had difficulty sleeping through the night without being up from 2-5 in the morning. I would say since month 4 I have not had one night where I have woken up and not been able to fall right back to bed. Most nights I don’t wake up at all until morning. My wife of 21 years has also commented on these changes and has stated that she has notice that some of the things that used to be “triggers” pass by me not noticed.
Thanks for the space to share.

[Anonymous]

I hope the month (almost two months) since this post things have continued to progress and stabilize/deepen for you.. I like the recognition of what I can see as changes (AHAs and specifics) as well as sort of “Marking changes in height on the wall” .(as in growing up- kids, and parents, may not notice day-by-day getting-taller.. but over time.. it adds up).. at time it needs to somehow be able to see the shifts (jumps or sprouts even).
Often I think the biggest gains are not what we expect, not in terms of the type of changes, but in how those changes are experienced (ie feeling dissolved and released-let go.. assumed it will feel, XYZ, but then are that develops.. oh gee).

I was just listening to a coach bemoan how often people will work towards a goal (especially those that take a while, over much time to develop a foundation), and then reach it and think.. gee its no longer what I want.
—- but is that bad, in the sense, if 5, or 10, years go by, and regardless of how your circumstances change, if you basically see the world in the same way, if you have the same viewpoint.. have you changed (and thus “grown/developed”) during that time?

Espec if over 5, or even 10, years— one might expect over that time, a person’s view and ‘under-standings’ would ripen no matter what one is doing (life-path, etc)… but even more so, if one is engaging in some Pursuit which is even partially supposed to reveal aspects of one’s mind, and dormant capacities.. engaging in that sort of “work”- then even more of a change ‘expected’?

Thanks for the space to share.. and I hiope others here have also (no matter how much of a practice one may have arriving to here with/from)

[Author]

Posts