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Hi
I’ve been studying tai chi for nearly 5 years now and do, on occasions, sense the “moving meditation” aspect of it but I felt that the nature of my life needed a more focussed form of meditation hence my arrival here. However, I have absolutely no experience otherwise and feel a little “intimidated” (not quite the right word) by the amount that others in the this group already seem to understand, and the wide range of practices they seem to have studied. I am even struggling to sit for 20 minutes at the moment! I look up and find it’s only been 5-10 minutes. However, I’m hoping this will improve and I’ll try and build a little at a time I think. Maybe my first week will take 2 weeks. Is this OK? And taking note of the stuff in my head has been a real challenge so far without getting distracted into a chain of thoughts about a particular subject. For example, I note that there’s a lot of concern about a certain person. But then I head off on a string of thoughts about that person, how I’m involved with them and what I can do to help. I can’t seem to just leave it at noting the fact that it’s there in my head. Does this happen to other people?
Any advice for an extremely inexperienced newby would be appreciated.
Hello,
don’t worry, you aren’t the only beginner here
Maybe you can draw on your experience learning tai chi – you’ve probably struggled with it when you started too, but things improved with practice. As a beginner myself, the only advice I can give is to watch what your eyes are doing. You should be looking straight ahead (or as if, with eyes closed). Visualizing and “mental movies” usually require the eyes to look up, so that’s one way of avoiding that trap.
Thank you for your advice. I’ll try and hold the eye position as you suggest. I have to close them because I’m so easily distracted, but I understand what you mean.
Welcome, Lesley. Everybody has been where you are. Everybody. This is just how it is in the beginning. For starters, I think there will be a mixture of beginners and advanced students in this group, and also I imagine that since enrollment is still open, there will be some that start later than others.
I think many people end up quitting meditation in the beginning just because they are too hard on themselves. If 20 minutes is causing you strain, I would cut it back to 5-10, and work up to doing 20. Pick a time that makes you think, “I can do that!” If you give yourself a break, you will probably find that in time, you can feel like you can do a little more.
Our mind is a funny little gadget. Thoughts will not stop just because you want them to, or order them to. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.The best thing you can do is to just notice every time your mind has been caught up in thought, bring your attention back, and notice where you feel any discomfort physically, energetically, mentally, or emotionally. Patiently bringing your attention back is the only way to eventually calm the active mind, no matter how long you have been ‘gone’.
So my advice would be to find a pattern that works for you, a pattern that doesn’t cause you frustration, or to feel like not doing the practice. I don’t see that any guidelines have been posted about how closely you have to stay “on schedule”, so unless someone tells you otherwise, do what feels right. It also might be important to note that this first exercise is not meant to be something that you do until you get it perfect! If that were the case, I doubt any of us would get past the first week’s lesson in less than a year…
So relax, give yourself a break, and feel free to ask us any time you have a question. You are on your way to what is an often bumpy, but ultimately rewarding ride.
Thank you Catherine – it helps to know that I’m “normal”. I have a very busy life that involves huge numbers of other people (I’m a college lecturer) so my brain is always on the go. One of the reasons I want to learn to meditate is that I do seem to live in my head (if you know what I mean), and I think the rest of me needs more attention. I really appreciate your advice and will build up the practice time slowly.
……hi Lesley, Catherine’s advice is bang on the mark. Simply recognising how active your mind is shows how you can be attentive to what’s going on inside – that’s a real achievement. I’ve been recognising my ‘thinking self’ rattling away for years! Regarding eyes, I think it helps to close them if the internal distractions are already enough of a challenge. If you’ve not read about the ‘seventy percent rule’, a modern take on ancient China’s ‘Law of the Golden Mean’, check out (http://www.longwatertaichi.co.uk/longwater-system/seventy-percent-rule), it applies to meditation as much as tai chi and qigong.
Hello, all.
I found it very helpful to get a meditation timer. Then you’re not constantly wondering how much time has gone by, looking up at the clock, trying not to look at the clock, etc. You set the timer and just let go. The one that’s worked best for me is the Enso timer. A bit pricey, but worth it. It has a very gentle chime, very much like the ones on Bruce’s breathing CDs.
best wishes,
Matthew
What a wonderfully simple but helpful suggestion Matthew – thank you. I do appreciate the help that I am getting from this forum. The Enso timer is a bit expensive to treat myself to at present but there’s a birthday coming soon! In the meantime, it looks like there are some meditation timers I could try out on my laptop, which would remove the distraction of wondering about the time, and which would allow me to build up gradually. Onward…..
Thats sounds like a good idea. At the moment Im using my cell phone alarm. It gets the job done but not the most gentle way to finish off a meditation session, even on vibrate. Cheers.
……..there is a really neat iphone ap with a timer and sound board with lots of different meditation sounds , e.g., zen and tibetan chimes, flutes, chants and all sorts of stuff – I searched ‘meditation’ on itunes iphone aps some time back
Hey Lesley,
Looks like you’ve already gotten lots of great advice and suggestions. I teach at a university as well and know exactly what you mean by “living in your mind”. In addition to what Catherine, Colin, and Matthew have shared, I’ll add a little of my own experience.
I have found that my mind has a tendency to take me to areas of my life that are in need of some attention, such as a conversation I am avoiding. While it is important during meditation to learn to just let the thoughts arise and recede of their own accord, taking stock of those thoughts has helped me address and find resolution with the object of a particularly strong or tenacious thought, once I return and engage with it in my daily life.
Thanks for the suggestion Colin. I have also used my Iphone timer for ages but the sound is a bit harsh.
Based on your suggestion I downloaded a free app called “Zen Timer Lite” which seems very useful. It has a nice tibetan bowl chime to end the session.
Thank you Scott – that is interesting, and a useful effect of taking stock. I’ll watch out for it!
I must say, it is really nice to be studying this introduction to meditation on my own but with other people if that makes sense. I could never really face learning in a formal group, as I always felt it would be a very individual experience and I wanted to take it at my own pace. Reading never quite worked either. This is perfect. I can practice a little at a time, at my own speed, while still being able to appreciate the advice and suggestions of others. Thank you all very much.
I think I’m ready to try the 2nd week’s practice now, maybe returning to the 1st week’s exercise occasionally, as time allows, to remind myself “what’s on the shelves”.
Hello everyone,
Just joined the circle a few days ago. A few years ago I bought that Enso timer but hadn’t used it until now. I love that it has interval segments so I can split up my sitting and standing times to meet my needs.
I feel like I’m playing catch up myself, wishing I had joined sooner. I also practice tai chi daily and understand the value of RELAX and am excited for the learning yet to come. Lori Gamroth
Hey there Colin, Thanks for the suggestion; I managed to find and download that one and it works wonderfully.
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