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Okay, so I started the next lesson today, and it was interesting. This is the first time I’ve done a meditation practice that involves counting. I didn’t lose my place, surprisingly, but I noticed that my mind was a little active between the numbers…It was as if my mind thought that since it was allowed to count to ten, it should be allowed a little extra thinking as well. The thoughts were “light” – not the kind of thought with a lot of energy behind it, the kind where they just sweep you away and take over like a tidal wave – but just playing lightly between the counting. I’m going to have to start playing with the gaps in the breath, and opening my mind, and see where that leads me.
I do my meditation after I wake up, because my mind is still half asleep so it’s easier. I was able to count 10 breaths on the first try. However I doubt I would be able to do it in the evening – when I try to count my steps during my bagua practice (which I do in the evenings), I can rarely go past 3 or 4 before spacing out, it’s sort of hilarious.
After meditation today I realized Im not yet able to breathe 10 breaths completely undistracted. In regards to my being present I noticed how my breath shortens and becomes uneven while distracted and my eyes and legs can tense up a bit .
Also, my mind tends to drift at the beginning or ending of breath or while counting, the numbers seem to blend into a thought or from an external noise somewhere outside of the room.
I find Im distracted to various degrees as well, sometimes it will be a simple recognition of an external sound for half a second or my mind will drift for nearly an entire breath before I regain presence.
When I do manage to get in a few undistracted breaths I observed my breath becomes more subtle and deeper and I can feel almost like a “switch” or “shift” in my consciousness or awareness it becomes deeper.
Does a simple recognition of an external sound count as distraction if I keep to my counting and breath?
Does anyone share similar experiences or have any advice?
Kevin – to try and answer your question, of course it’s normal to register outside noises when you meditate, but perhaps it’s more important to realize that we don’t need to intellectualize much at all in this exercise. The fact that you observed these things is great, but once you start to catagorize your experience, as in wondering if something is in the catagory of a ‘distraction’ or ‘not a distraction’, then you are bringing your intellect into it, wondering if it’s ‘this’ or ‘that’. I think level of distraction is never black or white, but shades of grey, and very subtle shades of grey at that. Just experiencing it for what it is is fine.
I think I’ve probably gained some counting skills from counting exercises in qigong. Although I can stay fairly focused, I also realized that if I wasn’t paying attention, my mind would be perfectly happy to do two things at once: count, and babble along about nothing the whole time. I feel like I am often playing with what feels like the lens of a camera, moving between a sharper focus, to a softer focus, bringing it back from a kind of soggy, sleepy focus, etc. I think this may be similar to when you felt something shift, Kevin. Sometimes you just shift into a place where it feels right, and opens up.
I’m interested to see how my practice evolves over the week…
Thanks for your insight Catherine. I like the lens simile; I’ll keep it in mind for next time.
Ah ha! Thank you Catherine – I just came to this discussion to ask advice about a very similar experience to Kevin’s. I’m not very good at putting it into words yet but I recognised that I was making it too much of an intellectual exercise, and thinking too much about the actual counting words. Then my brain was convinced it could do 2 things at once but… having got as far as 8 breaths the first time before another thought process took over, I then got to 6, then 8 again then only 3. So I stopped for a while and did a few qigong exercises before trying again. I decided to try making it more of a physical counting process than using language-based thoughts so I counted by opening fingers from my closed fists. My mind naturally then seemed to focus more on the actual physical sensation of breathing and finger moving, rather than trying to form a sequence of words.
Hi Folks,
I have a couple questions about this weeks practice.
I noticed that I was slowly counting the number for the entire exhale. It was relatively simple to make it to ten, but when I tried counting at the end (inhale,exhale,count) it was much harder. I think this is the way we are practicing?
I also wondered how distracted is distracted enough to begin again at one? I had a similar experience to some other posters in that I could stay with what number I was at, but my mind was pretty active as well.Thank You,
Steve
Hi, Steve. I think you are right about counting the number only once, instead of counting continuously through the exhale. It’s harder that way, but I think it really doesn’t matter – the point of the exercise is to develop our concentration through the daily practice, so it shouldn’t really matter what your starting point is.
I took the instructions to be that you only start over if you loose track of where you are, loose your place in the counting. That’s what I’ve been doing. I hope this helps!
I started this weeks practice by saying the number in my mind and then breathing in and out. And then I thought I should be counting it after I breath. What order are other people using for the count.
I can’t seem to do any other thinking besides remembering the number of breaths I’m taking. I have less distractions than just sitting in meditation like we did in week 1.
Thats a different way of counting; think I’ll try it. I have been counting as I breathe and then after each complete in/out on my fingers. Consider yourself lucky to only be able to think only about the number.
My guess is that it’s not too big a deal as far as what method you use for counting. One thing we might want to keep in mind, though – part of this week’s lesson involved noticing and playing a bit with the feeling of the gap between inbreath/outbreath, outbreath/inbreath. If you are saying your number right in that gap, it seems like it would be harder to notice it, and keep the mind ‘open’ in that space.
Just something to consider. I think I have been counting the number at the beginning of the outbreath, I just seemed to fall into that pattern.
Hi
I’m having considerable success now by just gently opening my fingers from my closed fists as I exhale. The two physical processes seem to have linked so that I just notice the action of them both occurring together, but I don’t have to think about consciously counting specific numbers at a particular part of the breath. It’s making it easier to recognise the gaps between the breaths, as the interfering thought processes involving words are subsiding and being replaced by simple physical sensation. I wonder if that might help anyone?
Lesley, that is a very good idea. I will try that method. I had started just opening my fingers during the first day and then switched just to thinking the numbers. But I see the advantage of using a physical movement along with the exhale rather than a conscious counting.
I am now opening my fingers to count the breaths after the exhale and not as I’m exhaling. This seems to be working easier and I’m more successful with counting the ten breaths. So I’m counting breath 1 after that breath is totally over.
I have just finished my second meditation of week two and it sounds like you folks are of the same mind as I am. I was kind of counting along in my head with the release of a finger which I’ve been doing at the end of the exhale. That seemed to be redundant and maybe counterproductive. So, I worked on just releasing a finger with each breath and when I have two full sets of fingers starting over.
I’m thinking that’s why some schools of meditation use beads that have whatever number. There’s likely nothing magical about the number ten that it’s just the action of recording and being aware of each breath and the numbers are beside the point.
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